Friday, December 30th, 2011

*Customer is finishing a transaction at the register.*

Customer:  Do you guys accept cards?
Employee:  We take Visa and Mastercard.
Customer:  So can I use my Visacard?
Employee:  ...We take Visa and Mastercard.
Customer:  Oh okay then.

*Customer rummages through his oversized wallet for a few seconds.*

Customer:  Can I pay in Canadian currency?

*The customer thumbs through his wallet which contains thousands of dollars in Canadian currency.*

Employee:  No, only American money.

*He switches to a different pocket of the large wallet which contains only American 100 dollar bills.*

Customer:  How about hundreds?
Employee:  That's...fine.

*The total transaction was less than 20 American dollars.*

Thursday, December 22nd, 2011

*Customer approaches register.*

Employee:  Hello.

Customer:  Hi!

Employee:  How are you today?

Customer:  28.

Sunday, December 18th, 2011

Customer:  Excuse me sir.
Employee:  Yes?
Customer:  Will the cases for the iPhone 4 fit the iPhone 4S?
Employee:  Yep all the cases for the 4 fit the 4S.
Customer:  But they're different sizes.
Employee:  The iPhone 4 and 4S are the same size actually.
Customer:  No.  They arn't.
Employee:  Yep, they have the exact same case really.
Customer:  No!  They're different sizes so this won't fit.
Employee:  I assure you, all of these cases will in fact fit the 4S.
Customer:  No they wont!  They arn't the same size.  They changed it!
Employee:  Okay, you're right.  They won't fit.

Thursday, December 15th, 2011

*An employee notices his manager placing packing tape along the corners of several metal cages containing items on the floor of the store*

Employee:  Are these falling apart or something?
Manager:  Nope.
Employee:  Then why are you taping them?
Manager:  Some lady says her child cut himself on one of them.
Employee:  That sucks, but I still don't understand why that means you need to tape them.
Manager:  She demanded to know what I was going to do about how dangerous they were.
Employee:  ...really?

*At this point the employee begins to run his hand over the corners of the displays that are not yet taped to see how sharp they actually are.  As he is doing so a customer runs over to the employee and manager.*

Customer:  DON'T MAKE FUN!
Employee:  Excuse me?
Customer:  DO NOT MAKE FUN OF IT!
Employee:  What??
Customer:  I am a registered nurse!!!
Employee:  Okay?
Customer:  You can get TETANUS from that!!!
Employee:  I was just seeing how sharp they were since-
Customer:  Do NOT make fun.  My child could have gotten seriously hurt!

*The customer stares as angrily as possible at the employee and manager for several seconds before storming off.*

Tuesday, December 13th, 2011

Customer:  Excuse me, do you guys have pillow pets?

Employee:  Yea they are on the far wall behind you, near the gift bags.

Customer:  No no, I'm looking for pillow pets.

Employee:  Yea, like I said they're right over there.

Customer:  No, I'm looking for the pillows that are shaped like animals.

Employee:  ...Yes, pillow pets right?

Customer:  Yes those.

Employee:  Okay, they are right there in the display attached to the wall behind you.

Customer:  Not those, I want pillow pets.

Employee:  That is the only place we have pillow pets stocked.  If you would just turn around and look on the wall over there you will see them.

*This whole time the customer has refused to turn around and actually look where the employee is explaining that the item is.  After some more back and forth, the customer eventually turns around and looks at the wall where the employee has been pointing to for the entire conversation.*

Customer:  Oh yep, those are them.  Thanks!

Thursday, December 1st, 2011

*Customer is finishing a transaction at the register*

Customer:  You guys take cards right?
Employee:  Yea, we take Visa and Mastercard.
Customer:  Oh...well mine is a Chase.